The Comparison Trap~Have You Been There?

Have you ever found yourself on the hamster wheel of comparison? If so, how did you get off?

Getting on that wheel is so very easy. Getting off? Not so much. It's the "stuff" that you push down, usually from our past and/or childhood, but at just the right time (or not) it rears back up. It can cause you to doubt yourself before you even realize what's happening.

Before I ever took my first yoga class, I compared my abilities (or what I considered lack of) to all those yoga pictures I had ever seen. Those young, super thin, extremely flexible (likely hyper-mobile) yogis; with their foot or feet behind their head, doing the perfect split, and other shapes that my body has never been in and likely never will. I thought I couldn't "do" yoga because "I would have to be able to do that". I didn't know that yoga is a practice, that meets us where we are today. I didn't know that I was right where "I" am meant to be. That if my feet never went behind my head, or I never in my life do a split; that's okay!

When I started teaching yoga, I jumped on that wheel again. And let me tell you, I was running full steam ahead!! I compared myself to my teacher. It probably didn't help that my teacher I started practicing yoga with and EVERYONE loves, was my YTT (yoga teacher training) teacher. When I had to teach for my first practice teach, I prayed and prayed that she would not be the person to facilitate my teaching. I just knew she would say to herself and maybe even me "what have I taught you all these years, you haven't learned a thing". I got lucky and she was not my facilitator, that time...but the next time, she was. How could I ever measure up? Could I ever teach like she does? Will I ever be that good? What was I thinking, this teaching yoga?

I got over that, most days. Then came good old 2020! The pandemic, the quarantine. It was time to teach online! WTH? Who was I to think I could do that? But I had to make a decision; pivot or stop teaching. So try, I did. And here we are. Somedays are better than others, but I'm getting there. Just like yoga is a practice, and we progress, I am a work in progress and continue to progress.